Work Sucks

So our patient census today is 34. It hasn't gone up more then to 40 patients since I was told about potential layoffs. Went in to talk to HR today and she told me most likely layoffs will be by the end of the week. Tomorrow and Thursday I have to travel to our "sister" hospital to learn central supply from their lady there. I think I may need to give up my manager position at the mall sooner rather then later. It is all just to stressfull to think about. I talk to DH about it and he says don't worry about it, if you want to quit working at the mall then quit. He doesn't seem to understand that if I quit I am not sure we can pay all our bills let alone pay off any debt sooner. He applied at that 2 weeks off/on job and hasn't heard anything back. Don't see how I am ever going to be able to conceive a baby with all this stress in my life. Speaking of, I am 4dpo today and plan to test in one week. Although I don't have my hopes up.

My weekend

I had a pretty good weekend. Friday went shopping with my friend who is getting married July 15th:) And we picked her wedding dress and ordered it! She was so excited. Then we went out for pedicures and to dinner with friends.
Before we went dress shopping Brandon was taking me to meet my friends future MIL so I could ride with her...Brandon and I are sitting in the middle lane waiting for traffic to pass so we could get over. Out of no where this hooker hits us head on! It's like watching something happen in slow motion but knowing there is nothing you can do to stop it. She was trying to cross over all lanes and her head was completely turned to the right staring at the freeway. We are laying on the horn and as soon as she turned her head back she slammed into us. You could see the look of surprise in her face and then she just started balling LOL I thought that part was pretty damn funny. Anyways, she tried to lie and say she was looking both ways and blah blah blah. Bitch we saw you! I was pissed. We have had our truck for about 3 months. The insurance adjuster is coming out today to check out the damages so we can get it fixed. Here is our truck (before it got hit)


Saturday my friend and I watched reruns of Army wives (trying to get her caught up on the seasons) and Brandon and I went out for dinner that night. I also went to my friends mothers house to work on some stuff for her baby shower next weekend. We made waxed diapers to go on the tables. I was so unsure about this when she tried telling me about it lol I thought it sounded weird. But we went ahead and made them. You take a piece of cloth and pin it together like a diaper and then dip it in wax. Then you form it to look like a diaper. They are going to be sat at each place for all the guests, and they will be filled with nuts, and candy for them to snack on.

Here is the diaper cake i made for her:


Sunday I got all the christmas decorations put up and the laundry down! Felt very accomplished lol

And on a completely different note lol I am going to get my hair lightened with lots of blonde added to it in 2 weeks;)But I was playing with that face in hole application for facebook and thought I looked pretty damn hot for a blonde!!! LOL, but DH isn't having any of that lol So thats why I am going partially blonde again. Here was the FIH:

I have a hairball:)

LOL, thats what DH said to me last night.

Backstory...
My sister just turned 10 so she doesn't know all about the birds and the bees yet. My brother just got a brand new cat for Christmas, Sarabi. She started doing weird things around the house, meowing like she is being tortured and sticking her butt up in the air 24/7. LOL, it is quite humorous. So come to find out my brothers cat is in heat! My sister asked my mom why Sarabi was acting that way and my mothers response was "She has a hairball" lol So DH and I go over there for New years day and my sister informs me that Sarabi has a hairball and thats why she is acting weird. She is not alowed out of the house because she was to work that hairball out of her system. So all night someone would say something or Sarabi would meow like crazy and someone would say "Better be nice to her she has a hairball" lol Seriously it may not sound funny, but it was :) maybe it is one of those you have to be there type of things.

So last night I am trying to get some sexy time in from DH for the 3rd night and he wasn't having it lol We both work long days and he was tired, he told me lets try tomorrow. (Secretly okay with this because I had just worked 3 14 hour days in a row and I was beat!)But of course I was still trying to get me some:P He said "Let me guess, this is your fertile time?" I said yep so thats why this needs to happen lol We were quiet for a minute and said "You have a hairball" lol I burst out laughing. He then said "If you start sticking your butt up in the air I am going to get worried" :) Gotta love him.

I know I am O'ing very soon so I am getting some tonight and tomorrow:P Like you all care, lol but I thought I would inform you:)

Small Update

Just spoke with my boss. I wanted to know a time frame before lay offs started to happen and how long I had till I am running two departments. She told me 1-2 weeks. This is good news to me because I have been thinking It could be any minute. So this means I can bump more on ttgp lol well for another week at least.

On a side note, we did get 6 patients admitted last night so that helped our census a little bit. Still on flex here at work though. We are at 38 in house patients today, we need 45 to be off flex and about 55 for no layoffs probably. We have been "flexed" for about 7 months now. It would be awesome if we got alot of patients and our census stayed up and they didn't have to lay anybody off! I can always hope right?

*Wednesday Weigh In*

So this week was hard for me lol I guess the first week always is though.

12/28/2010-146.6
1/5/2011-145 (1.6 pound loss)

So, I think that is pretty good considering I didn't work out at all but just watched what I was eating a little more. I think next week will be better because a lot happened this week. We had new years eve/day where we ate alot and drank alot. We also went out to eat at 3 restaurants because we had gift cards from Christmas. Plus don't forget we went to the Texans game and I had some stadium food. But all in all I think it went pretty good. So lets pretend this is our cycle and I get pregnant, at this rate I could be at 143 which I would be happy with for starting weight of a pregnancy. But only time will tell...

And an update on the job front...

Brandon and I talked about all of our options last night and everything is still on the table. You know right away when they told me my two choices I jumped on running both departments because I would do anything to keep my job. I seriously thought I would be here for years to come, I had no plans to leave anytime soon. But the more I thought about it yesterday the more mad I got. I mean, I feel cheated and tricked somehow. They expect me to run 2 departments for the price of only 1 department. So I get ALOT of extra work (obv enough for 2 people). I think that is fvcked up!

So our plan is for Brandon to look for either a 2nd job or a better one that way I can quit my job from the mall and only work my ass off here at the hospital and hope after the 6-7 months they see how dedicated I am and census goes back up so they hire another cs person and give me a raise for being a "team player". OR I say screw this and find another job that I get paid for what I actually do and Brandon still finds another job. The downside to quitting here is I really do love it here, I feel comfortable with everyone and feel like I made some friends over the past couple of years. Also the biggest reason is my insurance. What happens if I get pregnant before anything is decided? I know it won't be east getting a new job newly pregnant or getting new insurance. And I am not the type to ttc with no insurance, I will not be one of those people. So that means I would have to put off ttc if I decided to switch jobs and I don't know if I could do that:( The only plus for finding a new job and quitting this one would be I could collect my 401k which would be about $10,000 in my pocket:)

Oh, forgot this part...Brandon is talking to his cousin to see if they are hiring at his job which is in the oil field. 2 weeks on, 2 weeks off. I have always been against these type of jobs big time because I don't think you can be a family when the husband is never home. Well you can, but it would be hard. But this job would pay the bills and even be enough for me to quit my job if I wanted, thats how good the money is there. I told him if he wanted to consider this job we could talk about it but we would need to set some rules before hand. I wouldn't want him getting set on this money for to long. Just a year or so, enough time for us to pay off all debt and put some in savings. Then he would need to come back and get a real job where he could be home all the time. I would be so lonely without him for 2 weeks! He is my best friend and it would be so hard....Anybody else out there have any experience or relationships with a job where their SO has to be away for awhile?

Decisions, Decisions.

In one second everything can change...

I get a phone call on my office line from my boss saying meeting in thirty minutes, my office...So of course for the next 30 minutes I am freaking out wondering what the hell this meeting is about.

Meeting time: My boss asks me how the holidays were and just making small talk while we wait for the HR person to meet up with us for the meeting too. HR walks in and says sorry I got a conference call we are gonna have to reschedule...And I was like WHOA, wait a second somebody tell me what this is about so I don't spend the rest of the day stressing out. So she shuts the door and in a nutshell pretty much tells me they are laying off people in the hospital because census (amount of patients int he hospital) has been too low. (it has been very low for about 7 months now!)They need to lay off about 7 people. I run the radiology department, I am the only person in that department...no me...no xrays. So they said they want to try and keep me and my job but that means changes. Either I go down to part time or I pick up another department.

They told me they are probably going to lay off the women that runs central supply (orders everything the hospital needs) and I would run that department too. The women in central supply just had a baby a couple months ago who probably isn't even 6 months old right now and I think she is a single mom:( At this part I am trying very hard not to cry at the thought of losing my job and being stuck with all these bills that we would in no way be able to pay without my income. So I told them I can't go down to part time and I would obviously do whatever it took to keep my job (and income!). So it looks like soon I will be running the radiology department and the central supply department all by my freaking self with no raise for doing it either. (I also am head of the Employee Activity Committee here at the hospital) Plus don't forget I also have a part time job working at the mall. Just the thought of it stresses me out, especially since I know doing all that work should result in a pay increase but with layoffs hapening I know it wont. I told them let me know when everything is going down because I will have to train more to run that department (I ran part of it when the central supply girl was out on maternity leave).

So I get back to my department and called my husband. I started with "You need to look for another job that pays better" lol and he was like yeah, okay. (This is nothing new, he already knows he needs to eventually find a better job but we were in no hurry because we were hoping at his one year mark in June they would give him a raise.) I couldn't even keep from crying tellling him everything. He is going to call our friend who lives in Austin and see if they are hiring at his job just in case. He makes a ton of money at that job and would be able to pay all the bills on that income alone. But, that is in Austin....we live in Houston. 3-4 hour difference. So that would be DH staying in Austin during the week and then home for the weekends. I guess If we had to do that it would work but holy hell would it suck.

So as of right now I am just waiting to see what happens. I was told that if I agree to run both departments then it would probably be for 6-7 months. I have a feeling that if census doesn't pick up then they may want to do away with my job too. Today sucks.

Welcome a new year!

We had such a good weekend! New years eve at my friends house was sooo much fun. I didn't drink any wine, but had tons of bacardi and crystal light lol That was the first time I drank liquor in probably about 6 months or so. And I didn't get a hangover! lol I was pretty proud about that;) We made over 100 jello shots which were yummy. I also ate a couple plates of chips and queso, my weakness. That night My friend told me I would be pregnant before July.....okay thanks. She also informed me to quit trying and thinking about it because my stressing was why I am not pregnant....another okay thanks. I told her I am not stressing about getting pregnant. Yeah, I get upset when af shows each month but I think that is normal. I don't stress myself into a frenzy every day thinking about ttc. But all in all it was a fun night that ended about 3am. Today we went to the Texans game which we won! Then out to eat with friends. I hope this new year brings lots of new for us. Last year was all about change and our wedding. Hopefully this new year can be about us growing into a family with a baby:) And because my blog wouldn't be finished without pictures, here you go:)
Today before the game:


Me kicking ass at some flip cup!

Before our flip cup matches:)

Brandon and I

Brandon and his best mans baby girl, Emmalin

Jello shot anyone?


But I would like to add still no fast food from me! yay:) Which makes a week now. We DID eat at at a couple restaurants over the weekend but I don't consider that fast food. We also ate at the stadium today during the game but I was hungry and there was no going around that. But oh well, I just hope wednesday shows at least a pound lost....Till next time:)